is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Randomize
