A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
You were mumbling a lot and offered me 20 dollars to leave you alone
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
In reference to the club we were headed to our cab driver told us about the time he had sex with a woman on the dance floor there. And what do you know, they're celebrating their 22 marriage anniversary together this year! True love does exist!
Randomize
