what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
Why are there two phone calls to calgary police in my phone and why is there a voicemail from you asking for bail money
I swear to god those aren't related
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize
