she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
I had a dream last night that you and me were eating cheesecake and according to my FATHER I was moaning really loud in my sleep. I seriously have issues.
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
If I don't have tequila in my hand soon, I'm going to have to violate human rights laws
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
I just walked through the door and she ran up to me, hugged me, unzipped my pants and immediately started sucking my dick. Good day.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
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