I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
Randomize
