I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Sleeping with him wouldn't be considered hoeing out... It seems more like babysitting.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
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