I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I'm either going to be a Playboy Playmate or take over the world. Either way the world wins.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
Sometimes I feel like my vagina has a photographic memory of his penis. It sucks that he got engaged....
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