You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Apparently mr clean magic erasers don't clean blood off the ceiling
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
She's running around the streets punching people and narrating. I don't know whether to laugh or stop her
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I just don't understand why your parents aren't supporting your dreams of being a medieval weapon smith.
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
Randomize
