There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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