well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Are cops allowed to hit on you if they're in uniform?! Serious question.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Nothing like casual arson to brighten your day
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
