You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
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