Sponge bath it is.
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize