that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
Randomize
