you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
Hey, don't think you remember me but we met last night. I'm conducting a survey this morning its only one question: Have you seen Rob since 1am?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
