Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
You tried to poop in the sink last night.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Sorry, but when you makeout with a guy in a panda suit, you know something has to change.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
be right there i have to get my cape
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
