Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
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