You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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