i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
Randomize
