Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
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