Tell me I did not drive one hour for whiskey dick.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
This is the fourth day in a row I woke up with cheetos spread around me in a ritual pattern..this weed is unreal
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
