I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
You drunkenly hook up with 5 people in one night and suddenly everyone tries to party with you.
I'm eating Doritos at 9am because last nights weed is just now starting to wear off
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
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