alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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