Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
No he didn't understand the sequence...then I started texting him these texts with vagina strategically spelt correctly in jumbles of letters.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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