What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Randomize
