Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
Randomize
