The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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