Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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