How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
im sleeping in a hamic at a mansion. best hangover ever
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
How do u explain to your grandma that your relationship status is hooking up with randoms at a bar
Randomize
