my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
Got drunk and tried to deep fry burritos. Turns out wild turkey isn't a good replacement for vegetable oil. Nearly burned my house down.
Sober people should be as daring as drunk people more often, because honestly the fact you’ve lived so long is a sign that anything is possible.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I'm going for high school drunk, you've got 15 minutes to get here.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
