It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
He just asked me if he's allowed to flirt with me. That's how whipped he is.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Randomize