he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
You invited these random guys into your apartment that you met in the hallway...& then you started screaming at them to get out cause you didn't know who they were.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
