turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
Randomize