so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
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