Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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