Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
if only i could text you this smell
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Why'd you print out every dick pic you've ever received and tape them to the bathroom walls?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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