i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
Randomize
