I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
Barsexuality is the new black.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
I know. They started calling me The Incident. The hotel maids, that is.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Puked up breakfast after doing my first minze shot in a while, but that shot was to Trump losing the election, so it's all good.
Randomize
