I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Randomize
