I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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