Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
Dude respond to my evite. You're either coming to the orgy or not.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
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