watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
HahahahahaHAHAHAHAHAHAHA MY LIFE IS A CAUTIONARY TALE
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
I don't know what you're doing this morning, but obtaining Plan B is my number-one priority.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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