I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
And you were like "stop making pop tarts, lil bowow" as you grabbed the pop tarts from your ex and consumed them. Teach me your ways.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Bro, I live in a constant state of existential dread and moderate ennui. The prospect of cosmic horror doesn’t faze me that much.
Randomize
