Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
