I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I just woke up eating some beef jerky with my cat. I think she opened the bag for us.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Just woke up next to a hungry lesbian and a half eaten croissant on my stomach. Can you come get me?
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