She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
The real estate's complaint had the words "loud squealing at 2am" in it. Then I remembered that was me spoon feeding you guys old potato salad while you screeched like baby birds. Great night.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
