Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
Do vagina's smell?
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
he told me I talked like a deaf person
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
After seeing how much you are able to funnel in a night, I am 90% sure your blood is pure gin.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
Randomize