wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
she's on the floor slapping my dogs face with slices of pizza
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
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