VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I think i found piece of your tooth in my dick this morning when i took a shower
it glows. i had to have it.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
