I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I've also decided that the true test of whether or not you should marry a girl is if she will willingly blow you while you eat Oreos.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
things i am: 1) still drunk 2) still wearing my leopard onesie 3) still gonna make my 9am lecture despite the odds CAN I GET A HIGH FIVE
tell me about the fingering
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