his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
You high fived me for banging your sister but lock me outta house bc I ate your pumpkin pie? Priorities bro
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
My boob is missing a layer of skin
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
