Literal conversation "you are ________ ____. you facebook friended me"
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
honey bunches of taint.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
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