Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
Randomize
